中学生作文写作经常易犯的“10大病”

责任编辑:佚名     发表时间:2021-06-16 12:52     直接咨询专家 预约专家

  The problems of middle school students' composition are easy to make,In summary, there are roughly ten situations as follows:

  1. Observe that things are not refined,Floating light and glimpses,Even the narrative description in the composition is abstract and vague.

  A classmate wrote in "Pond Rain View": "The pond is surrounded by flowers and trees.There are various kinds of trees,A piece of lush greenery.The flowers are also various,Colorful."This description seems a little vague.Which trees are in the space,What are the characteristics of the tree,What flowers are there,What are the shapes and colors of these flowers,None of them came out.Not only that,It has also failed to hold down the word "rain".This is all due to poor observation.

  Second, the language is dry,No literary talent,The writing is not full enough.

  For example, there is an exercise titled "My Chinese Teacher",One paragraph reads like this: "She is relatively standard,wearing glasses,Speak quietly,Always laugh,I like her very much.“本文,From a grammatical point of view, there is obviously no problem.But from the perspective of the power and effect of portraying portraits and reproducing their voices and smiles,Language lacks the effort to modify and polish,Seems relatively plain,Lack of vividness and expressiveness.

  3. 机械模仿机械上,没有创新精神。

  有一篇书面文章,一段是这样的:“种下这小东西后,院落成为人们感觉的地方只是早上起床从学校回来不知不觉, 我总是必须在那里站一会儿。"This text,除了将叶圣陶的《早晨的荣耀》中的“完成的工作”更改为“放学后”之外,将“小李”更改为“小战”,其余文字几乎相同。这种像葫芦的模仿物,与from窃有何不同?当然,我在报纸上看到一篇好文章,受到启发后,结合您所看到的, 听到并感觉到,用您自己的语言撰写文章,尽管此类文章不可避免地具有“模仿”的痕迹,但是对于那些刚开始写作的人,值得称赞的。以及在其中替代X或Y的那种“模仿”,这不是数学游戏吗?

  第四, 创建单词,适用词汇令人困惑。

  例如:“我父亲是老师,对我的要求非常严格。“其他人不老,说他必须为人民服务几年。我的第一句话是“严烈”我根本无法在字典中找到它,它是天生的。 在第二句话中, “服务了几年”,拆解“服务”,这是一个零散的词。

  五, 重复单词,不要仔细检查不知道该如何调节单词。

  例如:“有三种到达目的地的方法,即左 中间和右边。左和右,路很远走到最近的路中间,所以在左边 中间和右边三个车道我们决定走在中间。“明显地,本文中有很多重复的内容,但是如果可以稍微调温一下把它变成“从左边有三条路, 到达目的地的中间和右边,中路最近所以我们决定走到中间“,这更加简洁。

  第六, 追求“闻其”,装作温柔怀疑是杰出的。

  “太阳升起了”一句话,最初非常流行和熟悉,也很简洁但实际上有人写成“带有金色光芒的圆形红色太阳,悄悄地从东山戳了一下脸”,要表明您是知识渊博的人才。

  先生。 鲁迅一直主张文章应易于理解。“从一个活生生的人的嘴里,采用生动的词汇,移到纸上。“同学们应该从这里得到一些启发。

  七, 之前和之后的冲突,Contradictory,Not logical.

  E.g,"I am a very naughty kid,I can say that I have been so naughty since I was a child."Since the front has admitted that he is a "child",Why do you say "from small to large" later?therefore,Conflict,There is a contradiction.

  8. Write scenery in isolation,Helpless subject,Write scenery for the sake of writing scenery.

  E.g,There is an article about what I saw and heard about the Spring Festival,It reads: "Being together in the morning,Seeing the gloomy sky,It seems to have a ‘sorrowful face.I don't know where the sun is hiding,Bei Feng was crying.At this moment,There was the sound of gongs and drums on the street,Firecrackers keep going up,People are celebrating the Spring Festival,How lively!"The author is willing to be Huandong who has written about the Spring Festival,But at the beginning of the scene,Not only can't set off the main idea,On the contrary, the bull's head is wrong with the horse's mouth,There was also a fight with the main theme.

  Nine, sing lightly,Gufang appreciates herself,Lack of anger and boldness.

  E.g,A classmate wrote in an article: "The pavilion is extremely deserted,Tired of walking alone,Then sit down.At this time,Suddenly I remembered Li Qingzhao's words: ‘The wind is going to the dust, the fragrance of flowers is gone,Tired of combing hair day and night.Things are people and nothing is done,If you want to talk and cry first.' Yeah,The scenery remains the same,But personnel are no longer.Thinking about,Unconsciously, tears fell like broken beads."indeed,In some of the students' assignments,Sing softly,Gufang appreciates herself,Became the main theme of their writing,Regarding the thinking and intervention of outlook on life and values,It is difficult to see each other with "a thousand calls".This weak, pathological style of writing,Should attract our attention.

  10. Contempt punctuation,Tease to the end,有的甚至全文不加标点。

  例如下面的一段文字:“人人挑灯夜读时,她已经上床睡觉,而人人要睡觉时,她便放声地扯起呼噜,大家都很愤怒,都纷纷地要捏她的脸。”这段话至少包含了两个完整的句子,应把“扯起呼噜”后的逗号改为句号才对。我们要重视标点,让标点更好地为文章服务。

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